Langsung ke konten utama

100626

Dulu,
tak ada alasan bagiku untuk tinggal
Tak sedikitpun
Kamu yang membuatku tinggal
Demi kamu

Dan,
Demi kamu pulalah kujalani perjuangan akhirku
Demi menjadi seseorang yang pantas bagimu
Yang bisa cukup baik dan pintar bagimu

Tawa dan tangis lebur jadi satu
Kukurangi jam tidurku
Demi akhir yang terbaik
Demi mimpiku dulu: kamu
Aku belajar mati-matian
Supaya aku pantas buatmu
Hingga suatu hari,
aku menjadi yang terbaik diantara kebanyakan teman kita
Tak pernah kubayangkan sanjungan2 itu, dari teman dan guru

Tapi lihatlah,
Aku menangis dan meraung
Lagi-lagi karenamu
Aku dilupakan dan semuanya berakhir dalam sekejap mata
Kau merasa benar dan terbebas
Aku tak minta maafmu, lupakan
Tp tanyakan pd dirimu:
Pantaskah aku kamu curangi ketika kukurangi jam tidurku demi kamu?
Pantaskah aku kamu curangi ketika aku belajar demi kamu?
Pantaskah aku kamu curangi ketika aku berjuang demi kamu?
Pantaskah aku?
Aku, orang yang pernah kamu minta untuk tinggal?

Komentar

Postingan populer dari blog ini

to define.

to start is the most challenging part: to define problems, to ask the right question, and to form a track. it's beyond technical matters, while solving is more likely taught by practical experience. 

It's been like 2 years?

I just finished skimming my post up to end 2012. Before getting married, and after marriage life up to last post before this. I didn't realized my post before marriage are mostly stories about a girl who tried so hard to get out of her miserable life with dark clouds inside her head facing her series of unfortunate events (I intended this blog to chute out those unnecessary garbage). After the wedding, honeymoon phase. Mmm, it was that fun, though. But, since I know this blog has other reader I tried to cover my bad stories. Wasn't like how I intended this blog to. After baby and few jobs, well, my life is actually getting better but still focus on my miserable life! (and list of hopes too) Last one, I wrote so many "haha" after a sentence that I think awkward, which now I find it annoying. Ha! (not haha)  I thought I was a positive person. But, it seems just to cover things up.  Even "let's giggle" this blog tagline is a survival, convincing my life...

a fair proof

love is such a fair proof that happiness does for everyone: everyone deserves to be happy. you may think that adornments are only for pretty people. we may think they deserve it because they charmed us, while we're dreaming to be one of them. but, no. love is a proof that happiness is for everyone. have you wonder -with do all respect, without any intention to insult- why ugly people, disabled people, bad people, or someone who we think hopeless living their life that you met, you know, or maybe random people you see in mrt have lovers? how come they could afford it? ow, really, i wondered. they have someone to hold their hands, to hug, to embrace, or to kiss (yes, it could be an awkward situation if your eyes caught looking at them). i mean, unlikely we don't see them in a pleasant way. we might think that those kind of people don't deserve that kind of adornments, because they... don't look pleasantly in our standard . but, no. who knows, maybe for people who lov...