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Meracau bergulir
Aku pun terus berlari
Terus mengejar pikiran
Raga dan batin tak mampu
Akal dan hati terasa tipuan
Jiwa yang rusak dan bingung
Itu yang tersisa

Permainan ini
Apa yang kucari
Tenang, aman
Dari mana harus kucari?
Dimana kutemukan sahabat sepanjang nafasku?
Aku hanya ingin ketenangan dr kepala yang kusandarkan dan pelukan yang kuterima


Aku bukan tidak bisa melihat kebaikan dariMu
Tak terhingga yang sepantasnya kusyukuri
Tapi aku mati rasa
Pincang

Buat aku merasa lagi Tuhan
Makna bersyukur dan memaafkan
Buat aku merasa lagi Tuhan
Untuk tertawa dalam kesedihan
Untuk menangis dalam kebahagiaan
Lembutkan ujung-ujung sarafku,
Berkahi setiap ototku dalam respon

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to define.

to start is the most challenging part: to define problems, to ask the right question, and to form a track. it's beyond technical matters, while solving is more likely taught by practical experience. 
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It's been like 2 years?

I just finished skimming my post up to end 2012. Before getting married, and after marriage life up to last post before this. I didn't realized my post before marriage are mostly stories about a girl who tried so hard to get out of her miserable life with dark clouds inside her head facing her series of unfortunate events (I intended this blog to chute out those unnecessary garbage). After the wedding, honeymoon phase. Mmm, it was that fun, though. But, since I know this blog has other reader I tried to cover my bad stories. Wasn't like how I intended this blog to. After baby and few jobs, well, my life is actually getting better but still focus on my miserable life! (and list of hopes too) Last one, I wrote so many "haha" after a sentence that I think awkward, which now I find it annoying. Ha! (not haha)  I thought I was a positive person. But, it seems just to cover things up.  Even "let's giggle" this blog tagline is a survival, convincing my life...
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a fair proof

love is such a fair proof that happiness does for everyone: everyone deserves to be happy. you may think that adornments are only for pretty people. we may think they deserve it because they charmed us, while we're dreaming to be one of them. but, no. love is a proof that happiness is for everyone. have you wonder -with do all respect, without any intention to insult- why ugly people, disabled people, bad people, or someone who we think hopeless living their life that you met, you know, or maybe random people you see in mrt have lovers? how come they could afford it? ow, really, i wondered. they have someone to hold their hands, to hug, to embrace, or to kiss (yes, it could be an awkward situation if your eyes caught looking at them). i mean, unlikely we don't see them in a pleasant way. we might think that those kind of people don't deserve that kind of adornments, because they... don't look pleasantly in our standard . but, no. who knows, maybe for people who lov...
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